Angela’s first Father’s Day
In November I went through the work of bringing Kai into this world. But what followed in the next 7 days was a beautiful miracle of life that I just sat back and enjoyed being witness to.
Daniel has taken care of me in many ways since we first met. His compassion to my physical struggles was one thing that made me fall in love with him so quickly. I’ve always known he was an incredible caretaker and husband. I’ve always known he would make a wonderful father, but knowing and seeing are two different things. Finally, mid-November I saw him evolve into an incredible father.
Daniel was the first one of us to lay eyes on our son. The doctor held him up so Daniel could share with me our sweet baby’s gender. The first words I heard him say (in my medicated haze) “We have a son.” During my c-section, I wasn’t allowed to hold Kai, because I was shaking too severely. So he went directly to Daniel. He held our new baby so tenderly, and they couldn’t seem to take their eyes off each other, other than a occasional glance and smile in my direction. In the recovery room, Kai didn’t cry during his vitamin injection. The nurses were surprised at how calm Kai was. I heard Daniel sigh, “I’m just so proud of him.”
My first day with Kai was the best, but I was still very limited following my surgery. I could hold him, and I was strong enough to stand for a few minutes at a time, but I couldn’t do much heavy lifting with the baby. Daniel had always been nervous, as most men are, about handling such a small and fragile human.
He braved his fear and was the first to change Kai’s diaper. When I struggled to recover, he spent nearly a week “sleeping” in a hospital chair, getting up every time the baby stirred. When my body reached its physical limit, he fed our Kai slowly with a dropper. Completely exhausted he showed up time after time to take care of both our son and me every single moment that we needed him. It’s an understatement, but I fell in love with him all over again. He held my bowl while I threw up, he wrapped the baby in his swaddle, he pushed himself to get work done when he should have been napping. He spent a week (and more) taking on the role and responsibilities of both parents while I was unable.
And while our time since has been much more “normal,” I can’t help but think back on that first week and feel like that was his proving ground. That was his labor process. And while he didn’t bring Kai into this world, but brought life to his new role, as father. And he’s lived up to it every single day since.
Happy Father’s Day, Daniel.