Seeking freedom of Gender Stereotypes
The podcast usually starts with: “This is Hidden Brain, I am Shankar Vedantam…”. I’ve been listening to this podcast for a while, in fact it is one of my go to companions when I go for my daily walks. It touches a wide diversity of themes that I felt I got access to ideas that regularly I wouldn't.
One night, around the end of 2018, this episode: Be The Change, cued into my ears. In short it is the story of a couple, in fact a cross cultural couple that tried from the very beginning of their parenting to rise their child in a environment free of gender stereotypes. Their reality, the challenges, and the impact on their child.
Angela is a feminist, and one hell of an inspiration as a human. I am a feminist in training wheels. But on thing we got clear since the day we were wondering and playing with the dream of having a child: we will give this new human the protection to grow strong and kind with out the poison that are gender stereotypes that society blindly supports.
To be sincere with you we don’t know how our journey is going to be, but we have clear few things:
Colors are colors, colors don’t define your gender
Curiosity is that, the desire to explore, it does not have to be directed by which gender are you
Exercise and physical activity should be encouraged no matter your gender
Deep learning and scientific research should be accesible to all
Kindness, caring, empathy, sympathy, love does not make you more male or female
In other words as simple as it sounds, but with deep repercussions:
Baby boys can wear pink and Baby girls can wear blue
Girls can play soccer and wrestle, Boys can imagine adventures with dolls and exercise dancing
Science, experimentation, getting messy and learning, are for both.
“From the very first day outside the mother’s womb, the new human is exposed to be shaped in ways that will define its life.”
For some reason that is why we decided to not discover the gender of our baby until he or she is born. We didn’t want to even let our selves to get biased by the gender. The truth is that no matter what, he or she will receive all of our love.
Personally, for us it is not about specifically gender identification. Which is another different universe of realities and challenges. This is about how words, expression and decision can affect the future of our child, from the very beginning.
Neutral colors, or primary colors is what we want our baby to see first, instead of only pink or only blue as society demands. Clothes that encourage exploration, getting dirty, and messy would be our first choice, instead of fitting on the template of what boys or girls should wear.
We would not let the wings of our child to be clipped.
Please, if you have a moment, give a try to this episode of Hidden Brain, this way you would understand a bit what is behind our decision. Thank you so much for choosing to be part of our village.